its tuesday so i'll chat

So... after a fairly lengthy hiatus from all things blog I’ve been summoned to return by my lovely and very easy to make laugh girlfriend to write my third instalment.


She suggested that I, similar to my first blog, just begin to type and see where it leads me.


I’m having various thoughts, actually, many thoughts, all racing through my mind. I of course want to write something interesting or funny and of course articulate and maybe even thought provoking, we’ll see...

So given my many thoughts, all of which are battling for space in my more than occupied mind, I have settled upon the subject of


Change.


I’ll open proceedings with a basic but usually very difficult to answer question.


"Why is change so hard?”


I pose this question as I’m in the midst of a lot of change. For one I’ve decided to move back to Liverpool in September. I have many reasons to leave London, but few to stay. I’ve been hovering around the idea for over a year and now I’ve decided I’m going to go.
Life in Liverpool offers less variety than London, but it almost certainly (for me) offers more heart, more warmth and more love. These traits are something I’ve learned must never been over looked or passed by or gotten back to. They are vital, variety is not. (I will miss endless Japanese food delivery though)


(Which leads me to another question? Why on earth are there no good Japanese delivery places ANYWHERE in Liverpool..? A city with one of the oldest Asian communities in Europe..? Chinese may rule in numbers but sadly the Chinese food (the version of Chinese food made to suit Europeans – not authentic Chinese) is caked in MSG, Japanese is not, it’s fresh and clean and the closest thing to a healthy fresh meal you can get without growing it yourself! Anyway... SOZ.)

Is change difficult because I’m set in my ways or lazy or am I blinkered? It took me 7 or 8 years to move to London, even though I wanted to very much, something (well anything) stopped me. I guess I was scared of the unknown? With the move back to Liverpool I’m scared of the familiar... By this I mean treading the same streets I have walked down since I was a boy. A city so deeply etched in my mind that I could get around with my eyes closed (I’ve tried it after circus many times). Maybe this reluctance to come back and walk the streets of my home town is part of being scared of change...?

When relationships have ended I’ve always found it hard to change and hard to let go (even if i handled privately and silently, I always (albeit temporarily) crave my ex. Whether it’s changing how I feel or changing a social circle or changing and address, it’s never easy.

Recently I’ve learned that change is easier than I once believed. Maybe its because ive changed many times now and ive seen the positive results of change. Even though it’s hard to break your own mould, it’s ALWAYS for the best and ALWAYS results in a better quality of life.

So I’m not looking at change as being a negative or a difficult process any longer. Change is to be embraced, something to be looked forward to and enjoyed.

i hope to welcome change.

Something exciting is around the corner and I can’t wait to find out what it is...



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